People ask me why I love being a sex therapist. It’s a pretty easy answer for me.
I love being a sex therapist because sex is important.
First, my work is all about sex. Sex is important. When people are happy with their sex life, it makes up about 20% of their relationship satisfaction. But when people are unhappy with their sex life, its importance jumps to about 70% of their entire relationship satisfaction. When a couple struggles with sex, it can become a big issue and take a significant toll on happiness for the people involved. Our sexuality is a birthright. Expressing it can be an experience of pleasure, connection, playfulness, creativity and love. It taps into a life force that is powerful and healing. Being cut off from our sexuality or being unable to express it, alone or with others, separates us from a part of ourselves that matters.
It’s great to have a job where I can really help people.
The second reason I love what I do is that I can help. I love doing work that makes a difference in people’s lives. I witness clients summon the courage to show up in my office, talk about things that are difficult and personal, and take the step of confronting themselves and their partners about what is really going on. I have the opportunity to guide people through an exploration of what gets in the way of their sexual connection and to create solutions. I help them have conversations they thought they’d never have. I offer an environment that is accepting, non-judgmental and yet appropriately challenging so that things can change. Every day, I watch people move from a place of resignation to one of hope and possibility.
I pursued a career in sex therapy because I know sex is important, and it is a loss in people’s lives if it is difficult. I have built my career around helping people turn that around and create their best possible sex life.
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