Ask for what you want

Ask for what you want

Part of being an honest partner means asking for what you want. If you have a desire, speak up about it. Ask for what you want rather than not even trying, going about it passively, or trying to manipulate the situation. Use the words “I want” or “I would like,” and...
What you want is okay

What you want is okay

I have often heard couples express fear or disappointment that their sexual interests are not a perfect match. Just as it is a myth that sex in a good relationship should never take work, it is a myth that if you and your partner are right for each other, you should...
What if you have no libido?

What if you have no libido?

Continuing with the theme of sexual myths, I want to talk about a common myth that trips up couples in my practice. Many people come into my office thinking they are broken or missing natural sexual desire, saying they have no libido or sex drive. Often, they have...
Too distracted to enjoy sex

Too distracted to enjoy sex

Can’t get your mind in the game? How to relax and be present in sex. Sex is enhanced when you can relax and be fully engaged in each moment. Stress, anxiety, fears and distractions diminish your access to pleasure and connection with your partner and what you...
Low sexual desire – 5 tips to spark some interest

Low sexual desire – 5 tips to spark some interest

Talk about what’s in the way I always start with the assumption that one or both of you have some good reasons for not being interested in sex as much you used to be. Whether it’s the sex you’re having, the meaning that sex has in your relationship, other relationship...