Your family history

Your family history

Understanding your part of the avoidance cycle in your relationship means taking a close look at your family history. In order to change your relationship patters, you have to get clear about your contributions to the problem and where they stem from. Let’s turn first...
Who packed your bags?

Who packed your bags?

My last several blogs have dealt with how to begin a conversation with your partner about sexual difficulties in your relationship. If you and your partner have come to an agreement about improving things together, you can now move into the conversations that form...
Make a request, but remain flexible

Make a request, but remain flexible

My last several blog posts have focused on how to make discussing relationship difficulties with your partner easier. I talked about how using “I” language and confronting yourself first can demonstrate to your partner that you are willing to take responsibility for...
Confront yourself first

Confront yourself first

In last week’s blog, I talked about how using “I” language can help improve communication with your partner. Doing so acknowledges to both of you that you take responsibility for your own feelings. Likewise, it is important to confront yourself first when discussing...
Use “I” language

Use “I” language

Use “I” language as much as possible, describing your own experience and your reaction to it, without making it about the other person. Don’t label or judge your partner. Don’t be attached to the idea that what you think and feel is right. Your feelings are valid...

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